CARDIOFASTERIZATION UPDATE

A BULLETIN FROM THE UN (ALLEGEDLY).

WORLD-RENOWNED NIXCO CARDIFASTERIZATION HAS SIGNIFICANT EFFECT ON GLOBAL WARMING.
Cardiofasterization, the essential premise of the NIXCO NATKINS diet (holding one's breath during exercise to increase the heart rate) contributes significantly to a drop in Global Warming.
By holding one's breath, one prevents GREENHOUSE GAS, CARBON DIOXIDE from being released into the atmosphere.
In fact several FORMER SOVIET REPUBLIC NATIONS now exhort their populations to hold their breaths for as long as possible to obtain Emissions Credits as specified in the KYOTO PROTOCOL.